Nut Cups and Man Thongs

When boys play sports, two things become obvious:

First, they need to score more points than their opponents, and as their parent you have now committed many hours of your life helping their team achieve that goal. You will be driving them to practice and games as well as other various and other assundered associated tasks that go along with team sports.

Second, not only do boys need to defend against their opponents, they need to defend their, shall we say, family jewels. In short, they need jock straps and cups.

If you're a mom, what is not so obvious is that boys don't care where they leave jock straps and cups. To them, it's another piece of sporting equipment to be dropped where ever the last pile of dirty clothes were left.

So, if I happen to find a cup next to my makeup and scream, "Get that thing out of here!" my boys laugh. (They think I'm over-reacting.)

If I walk into their bathroom (under duress) and find a cup in the middle of the floor and demand that it finds a new home, the owner saunters in like he has all the time in the world to put it away.

I'm not going to name all the places I've found non-drinking cups, but I will tell you, the boys have learned to put them away.

Recently, Rich was out of town and I had to help with the purchase of a cup and jock-strap.

I discovered these things come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. I swear there were aero-dynamic and titanium options, but none in stock that were the color blue in the size we needed.

Eventually, we did settle on an acceptable color choice, made our purchase, and headed to practice.

My son was SO EXCITED to get into his new equipment, he started changing in the minivan...while I was still driving it.

Soooo....

We were at a red light....I was telling my son to get into his seat and buckle back up, my son was holding up his jock strap up asking me which direction it went on, telling me he would only be one.more.minute, and I happened to check the rear view mirror where I see the guy behind me laughing....but he's trying really hard not too...

because I realized...

He was on the receiving end of a little boys bare butt, probably saw the jock strap, and figured out what was going on.

When I pointed out to my son that he mooned the guy behind us, my son was confident that it never happened. I didn't argue with him. I'm relieved that the authorities didn't follow me to the field.

You would think that would be the end of it...However,

Later that night, yet again I had to tell this son to put away his cup. As an added bonus, his brother yelled,

"And don't carry around your man thong around the house either! That's disgusting!"